In my last job, one of the more challenging projects I managed was upgrading a lot of really old hardware. I needed specs of the old hardware and the new and how the one set mapped to the other. Someone told me to go talk to a woman in AWS who had just stood up three data centers in Asia, so I wrote her an email and asked for her help. I was going to be in DC in a few weeks, where she was based, so we agreed to meet. She showed up for the meeting impeccably dressed, while I was in jeans and a sweatshirt, since I would be pulling cables in a data cage that afternoon. She was incredibly knowledgeable about hardware, listened to my needs, and gave me the conversion spreadsheet she had built, complete with formulas for calculating how much and what to buy. She was a lifesaver. She was also a Trans woman.
I haven’t spoken with her since that one meeting, but she has been in my head for the last five years. Every time someone says Trans woman aren’t women or Trans people don’t deserve equal protection under the law, I think of her. I think of the danger she faces just trying to live her life according to her truth and her heart.
Yesterday brought two horrible news items: a Trans woman, Dominique “Rem’mie” Fells, was brutally murdered in Philadelphia and the Trump administration finalized a rule that would remove nondiscrimination protections for LGBTQ people in health care and health insurance (ACA). My heart broke and the tears streamed down my face as I read these stories. How is this America? What has happened to equality, to care and concern, to taking care of each other?
This is a time of upheaval and uncertainty. I can’t just say “I’m going camping” any more and pretend none of it exists. Black Lives Matter. Trans Lives matter. Everyone deserves health care. Everyone. Your broke uncle, my disabled sister, your preemie baby, my trans coworker.
What can I do? I am one person. Just one person in this huge country. I cannot stay silent. I will not stay silent.
I stand with Trans people.
I stand with Black people.
I stand for human rights.
I stand for love.
and love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love cannot be killed or swept aside.
Lin-Manuel Miranda
I’m just reading this now… the day Neil & Company shocked everyone with their BIG decision. And their decision today means many of the hate filled policies of this administration are about to get kicked to the curb….
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/06/15/upshot/transgender-rights-trump.html?action=click&module=Top%20Stories&pgtype=Homepage
Of course, it shouldn’t take all this and people shouldn’t ever suffer to be who they are, but at least that arc really is bending toward justice. Stay hopeful…. November is coming.
Yes, it’s time. No one can hide in a silent “middle” anymore. You’re either part of the solution or part of the problem. The extreme right has radicalized everyone, even people who just want to be left alone. Time to vote the barbarians out and get back to doing the people’s business.
Thank you for speaking out. I agree with you completely. It is so easy to be comfortable being silent about injustices that do not touch us directly. But it affects everyone by making our world a worse place. You are someone I have been lucky enough to cross paths with. You inspire me with your travels, your independence, your photography, and your ethical values. Thank you.
Thank you for being the vocal light we all need when darkness and dystopia feel just around the corner. So much of prejudice is fear, and our not-president is clearly afraid of anything different from his own small, close minded opinions. I feel blessed and mightily enriched that my family and friends include all skin colors, all varieties of LBGTQ, and many nationalities. Diversity is strength, as nature proves again and again.
That moral arc of the universe that bends toward justice…the weight of our combined voices just might hasten that trajectory…
Together we must commit to relentless, forward motion…
There is a certain percentage of the country who firmly believe in this president (Trump.) I’m stunned that they can’t see through his con. Still they are posting about “if black lives matter, then what about the abortions black mothers get.” Or the inane, “all lives matter.” As the mother of a gay daughter, I find Trump’s latest hate-filled change to the ACA especially offensive. I’m really worried about what he can do in the next 143 days—but who’s counting?—until the election or WHEN he loses, the two+ months until January 20th inauguration. I take some solace in living in California, which would never agree to change their policy to what Trump as just done and exclude LGBTQ folk. But that doesn’t help other states. I’m furiously sending out postcard for the Texas, Alabama, and Florida NAACP to encourage lapsed voters to register and to vote. I just hope it’s enough.
Thank you for sharing your experiences and convictions. May we come out this better than how we got in it. I used to subscribe to “so long as I’m in uniform I should not vote,” but I no longer believe that now.
Beautifully done, cousin! I’m totally with you on this. I can feel your pain and frustration about what is happening NOW and HERE, as it is the same feelings so many of us are having. I am lucky that Colorado is a mail in or physical voting state, so I’ll be able to easily express my cry for CHANGE in November with my ballot. Love you!
Silence is complicity. I will not stay silent. I’m comfortable stepping out of line, and when we all post and speak up, we give permission for others to do so as well. Thank you for your post Annie.
Thank you Annie for speaking up!
I keep wondering why why why would the not-my-president remove nondiscrimination protections for LGBTQ people in health care and health insurance (ACA)? What is the rationale? There is none, other than hate. I am beyond sad for this country, but optimistic that better days will come.
I agree… with your ideas, with your point of view, with your position… my only reserve is I am not as firm in my stand as you seem to be. The slogan « Silence = Violence » describes me, unfortunately. But I guess necessity will command changes of behaviour.
Good day.
Thank you Annie.
On the sidewalk in the park a group of young students wrote: “white silence is violence.” Silence is complicity. It takes courage to confront hate all its forms. It takes courage to be allies.
As Pastor Niemoller wrote: “First they came for the socialists, but I did not speak out-because I was not a socialist. . . . Then they came for me-and there was no one left to speak for me.”
We who have privilege must use our privilege for meaningful good.
Thank you for your thoughts Annie, they are completely in line with mine. We need to keep our hearts open and be the helpers whenever the opportunity is in front of us. We also need to set the example for all those around us, until we can get this moron out in November. We have a trans niece, and this is certainly a difficult time for her.As always, I enjoyed reading your blog.
I hope that you are registered for absentee voting.
My first election that I voted in was in 1968. I was on a submarine based in Key West Fl. I was 21 that year and proud to cast my vote for HHH.
My grandmother (mom’s mom) was not able to vote until she was thirty although she was a college graduate.
We are glad that we were able to vote absentee last week in GA!
Lets hope that this will be another election like 1932. My grandmother was able to vote in that one.
Glad you voted in GA, that was a mess up there 🙁
I am registered for absentee ballot here in FL. WA State does all vote-by-mail, no fraud, very easy to use. I’m encouraging everyone to register for vote by mail, maybe I’ll do a piece on that. I have missed only one election vote in my entire adult life, and that was because the state had done one of those “return this postcard to confirm you still live here” deals and I didn’t see it. Since then, I’ve been vigilant about making sure I am registered. It took me three trips into town and about $5 in printing and scanning to get my vote up to WA State in time to get it counted for 2016, but I made it.
I have no words right now. I love your big heart, Annie. ❤️
Voting is more important than it has ever been! Looking forward to the day when love, compassion, and true humanity prevails. Thank you for your passion.
Anny, I read every words you put on this screen, and think I should answer, and never did. So sorry.
Thank you so much for saying it out loud.
Jean F
Annie, again your words are so powerful. You speak and write straight from your heart. It is impossible not hear you and be encouraged to do more ourselves.
If we call all encourage each other, we can make this a better country, a better world. Even as my heart is breaking, I have hope we can do better.
One person speaking up can encourage one other person to speak up, and another until there is a tipping point and we all feel comfortable speaking up. You are not only speaking up, but responding to hate with love and compassion, showing the way to anyone brave enough to follow that path. I hope I have the courage to challenge hate with love and not to with hate. Thank you for pointing me in that direction.
“As one person I cannot change the world, but I can change the world of one person.” – Paul Shane Spear
Thanks Annie. My hope is that we all look inside ourselves and try to stop this insane meanness that has taken over country. So many of us are so lucky. Action is so important now. Searching out causes to support policy change is where I’m spending time. Painting streets, changing profiles all feel good, but don’t do a lot to change policies.
Thank you for writing this Annie. It’s past the time where we can just stand by and watch what’s happening. We now have to participate.
Powerful words and feelings Annie. I agree with you 1000%!
Thank you, Donna. It’s a hard balance this week to do the 52 Frames challenge and figure out how to help in some small way make a difference in how things are going in this country.
I hear you Annie. I feel the heaviness of this dark energy sweeping over our country. I stand with you and all marginalized people who deserve true justice to live their lives with respect and honor. It will be up to us as individuals and communities to speak up, show up and stand up for ALL our brothers and sisters. Your breaking silence is an important moment. I stand with you. I stand for those who need our voices the most.
Thank you, Jenny. As white people, and white women, we have big privilege and I’m going to use mine to spotlight those who did not by accident of birth get this white skin or middle class upbringing. We need to protect each other with everything at our disposal.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Thank you, Annie. This was a beautiful, heartfelt essay that went straight to the point. I believe when we feel another person’s pain and suffering, we become more human. If enough of us do that, I think we collectively move our society to a better place.
That hope of collective action moving us to a better place is what keeps me going, Betsy. Thank you for reading and leaving a comment, too.